I struggle with getting out of my routine. I love getting up in the morning, listening to a sermon, reading blogs, taking the dogs for a run or a walk, and then going off to do my work for the day. However, travel is so good at upsetting that routine which is a WONDERFUL thing for an eating disorder. Eating disorders love predictability, but God loves to train His children to trust Him. That’s what travel has taught me.
9/11/2017 – 16 years ago I was 8 years old. I don’t think I really understood what happened that day. I knew it shook up the country. I knew that people had died in a horrible attack, and now it has sunk in only deeper. Life is so fragile and vulnerable. My life is so fragile; so many people passed from life into eternity that day. My heart hurts knowing that there were people who lost loved ones that day. I think one of the books that made it so real to me was this book, ‘Let’s Roll’ by Todd Beamer’s Wife. Todd died in a plane crash that day, a plane that was meant to go into another place and kill so many more people. He was one of the ones that attempted to retake the plane from the hijackers, and the plane crashed in Pennsylvania. The book is so powerful, and it reminds me that my life is in God’s hands. And there is no saying when I will die, and I want to be ready. I want to pray for those who are really grieving so hard today knowing that they lost ones they loved, and I want to continue to pray for those who are being affected by Hurricane Irma and the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey.
Meredith, my friend at the Cookie Chrunicle shared a post as she was so close that day to the happenings of September 11th, 2001.
‘O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory? The sting of death is sin; and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.’ (1 Corinthians 15:55-57)
I never thought I would share that I once struggled with binging (AKA: eating large quantities till I was uncomfortably full.), but I know God humbled my spirit through it and drew me closer to Himself and farther from the food that was my idol.
Life lately has felt like a really really fast roller-coaster and a long road. Let me explain by first sharing these verses from Psalm 40: 1-5, “I waited patiently for the Lord; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the Lord. Blessed is that man that maketh the Lord his trust, and respecteth not the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies. Many, O Lord my God, are thy wonderful works which thou hast done, and thy thoughts which are to us-ward: they cannot be reckoned up in order unto thee: if I would declare and speak of them, they are more than can be numbered.’ I’m realizing that so much of life requires patient, quiet waiting. Yet I stink at the ‘wait’ part and the ‘patient’ part. The hard part for me is being patient. It’s kind of like recovery and my health; I wanted to recover right away. I wanted to get my period back right away, but it took at least 2-3 years of intentionally being gentler and kinder to my body and wiser about my exercise.
I used to want to be part of everything. I used to want to do everything; I hated being bored. I didn’t want to be stuck in doing ‘mundane’ things, and then I had to recover. And that meant…. slowing down, doing less exercise, going less places, and focusing on something that I had neglected for years, my health. It taught me and is teaching me so much about contentment. 1 Timothy 6:6 has pretty much been the theme of my life for the past few years, ‘But godliness with contentment is great gain,’ as healing has been happening.
(I’m kind of fudging the rules a little bit for Meg’s Week in Review: I’m calling this sort of the ‘2 Year in Review’ because I’m feeling nostalgic.)
These past 2 years of being mostly at home, doing a calm job day by day, training dogs, not doing much traveling, and doing small things every days has taught me that I can enjoy God in the mundane. I don’t have to think that I have to go on a huge adventure or travel to another country in order to enjoy God’s goodness. I can enjoy God’s goodness in: