There’s this obsession on the internet. They talk about it extensively when it comes to body image, exercise, working out, or being fit. It’s the . . .
I’m often overcome with the fact that Americans are so consumed with the outward appearance. Of course, I don’t generalize this to all of Americans, but American media is often sucked into the vortex of ‘looking good.’ It’s on the magazine rack and especially models. These women are unrealistically skinny, living for the pleasure of the media and pleasing their adoring fans.
My heart breaks for them as I watch them try to fill their emptiness with something that won’t ever satisfy. My heart breaks because I went through the exact same process, and it left me empty and broken. This is also why I am so grateful for the burgeoning community of girls and women recovering from eating issues and idols and finding true freedom in recovery.
I’ve lost weight. I’ve gained weight. Neither has truly filled me. I’ve realized that the thigh gap isn’t something my body can sustain. If I had it, my body wouldn’t and couldn’t operate well.
I like the fact that I have no thigh gap, because it means something far deeper than just an outward appearance for me. I’m not so concerned about the thigh gaps. For me, no thigh gap means that my body is healthy. It means that I don’t go to bed obsessed with the idea of eating because I’m absolutely starving.
I’ve had the moments of looking down at my legs and thinking, ‘Why can’t they be thinner?’ I’ve realized that I’m so thankful I gained weight in order to be healthy, in order to run, jump, play, and enjoy life in God’s world. I’m not miserably thinking about my next meal or how hungry I am, because my body is restored. It’s more than a number. It’s an incredible state of being that is indescribable and immensely comforting, because my body is working the way God meant it to operate.
My body wasn’t made to be skinny. I’m not a girl who can be the 5’0″ and 100 pounds. It’s just not the way God made my body, and I am finding more and more peace in that fact everyday.
God gave me life. It wasn’t life to be starved out of my body. He gave me life so that I could serve Him. He gave me life so that I could jump on the trampoline, go to bed and think on His goodness, and jump out of bed in the morning, excited about His purposes and plans for my life.
Thankful for Jesus and the body He has given me for His glory!