Today, I have the top ten, scratch that, eleven things that helped my recovery. Nothing may seem groundbreaking, but I would say that each one is, in its own way. It’s kind of fun to be able to share these with you and just think of the road that I’ve traveled over 7 or 8 years.
I have been compiling this post in my head since Sunday, and I’m hoping it’s not too discombobulated.
Before I begin, I need to confess to you that:
I’m a Christian that struggles with pride.
What is being a Christian about? It’s definitely not about pride. Christ Jesus, the Lord of the universe, was so humble that He took upon Himself the form of a man just so He could come and fulfill God’s will by dying for sinners who didn’t care about Him. If that’s not humility, I don’t know what is.
Matthew 23:10-12, ‘Neither be ye called masters: for one is your Master, even Christ. But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant. And whosoever shall exalt himself shall be abased; and he that shall humble himself shall be exalted.’ “
The only reasons I recovered were due to ten major factors that God used in a beautiful way to weave a masterpiece out of the pieces of my shattered life.
So… today, I wanted to share all of those things that have enabled me to recover, because I’m humbled, humbled by God’s grace towards me and His undeserved love for an unworthy sinner.
Ten (11) Things That Helped Me Recover
1) The Power of Love Helped Me Recover – Maybe this sounds cheesy, but I was shown the Lord’s love in such a tremendous way by many people around me including my family. They showed me tough love.
They encouraged me to eat and confronted me in my idolatry. They literally did what John is talking about in 1 John 3:18, ‘My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.’
The best love of all? God’s love. 1 John 4:7-10, ‘Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.
In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.’
The fact that God loved me like that, before I even loved Him just always twists my mind into knots and makes me just cry out in praise, because I have no words.
(One of my best friends/classmates/AKA: my sister)
2) Being Homeschooled Helped Me Recover – Woah!!! I’m not sure if this is a shock to you or not, but being homeschooled was one of the best things that happened to me. Am I saying that everybody needs to homeschool?
Of course not, but I think the thing that made it so beautiful was that my parents and siblings love Jesus. And they were my teachers and my best friends who understood me in recovery. 🙂
They love Jesus, and the difference that Jesus Christ makes in their lives is evident. A comment someone made on one of my posts earlier in the week made me think about the word ‘patriarchy’ that sometimes comes associated with the homeschool movement.
In the modern sense of the term, patriarchy is kind of a negative thing. It makes you think of an angry man who abuses and controls his children, whose attitude towards his children is not the bowels of the compassion of Christ. But that’s not Christ. That’s the sin that comes out of our hearts.
So… by God’s grace, my dad and mom are the most AMAZING parents that I could have ever wished for and yet never deserved. They are gentle. They are kind.
My dad has let my sisters and I travel to other places in the world, and he doesn’t even worry about us. He prays for us, gives us wise advice, and sends us off which has been a huge testimony to me of his trust in God and his love for his children.
Patriarchy in the old sense of the word just described the patriarchs in the Bible, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Sadly, the word has been abused over the years.
I can honestly say that being homeschooled enabled me to see my humble, loving, gracious parents walking in the fruit of the Spirit and how amazing it is to follow Jesus. Galatians 5:22, ‘But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,’
3) A New Life Helped Me Recover – The new life in Christ that He gives is awesome. Going from being so dead inside and waking up feeling alive everyday is a wonderful thing. It’s hard sometimes, because life still has suffering. Yet I’m comforted by knowing that Jesus is my captain keeps me going through every up and down.
(This girl would be one of the MANY recovery warriors on Instagram that I am so grateful for. Janie’s account is ‘Live Healthy and Free.’)
4) The Recovery Community on Instagram Helped Me Recover – These girls and guys build each other up every day. They know the power of words, and the words they use for each other infuse life, not death, into others.
They make me think about the words I say and how every word I say is known to my Lord.
Psalm 19:14, ‘Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.’
5) Taking My Focus Off my Body and enjoying the world around me. – The more I see that recovery is not about my body but about physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional health, the more I buy bigger clothes, stay off the scale, and savor the fresh air. When I start to worry about what my body looks like I’m reminded of this promise that Jesus Christ makes in Matthew 6.
Matthew 6:25-26, ‘Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they’
If the birds don’t worry, why would I worry, because I know that He cares for me?
I’m thankful Christ promises a perfect body comes later. Philippians 3:20-21 ‘For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ: Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself.
6) Prayer and Meditating on the Scriptures – Prayer and God’s Word are powerful, because I’ve realized that it’s a gift to come into the throne room of Almighty God and bring my struggles and praises before Him, knowing that He cares in His infinite might and power.
It amazes me that I can approach the throne room again because Jesus Christ reconciles me to God.
Hebrews 4:14-16, ‘Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fastour profession. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.
Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.’
Prayer is powerful, because God moves mountains.
7) Travel – Travel teaches me to trust. It taught me that my recovery isn’t something I can control.
Yet, when God took me like a loving Father, drew me back to Him with cords of love, and rested me in His love, I realized that nothing, not even the BIGGEST night of food or a missed workout would separate me from His mighty love.
I’m realizing that His love is the only thing that keeps me from relapse.
8) Trials. Tough Times. Affliction. – Is that weird? Well, Romans 8:28, ‘All things work together for good to them that love God, to them that are the called according to His purpose,’ really just summed that up for me today again. The sad thing is that there are evil things that happen in this world cause Satan is the author of evil, but the amazing thing?
The amazing thing is that God can turn even the devices that the devil meant for evil for our good. The book of Job is a beautiful, amazing story of how God turned tragedy into good for His son Job. That book is incredible.
And God worked those years of eating struggles for good. He used them to humble me, so that I could share the story of how He restored the years the locusts have eaten, forgave my sins, and fills me with unspeakable joy.
1 Peter 1:8, ‘Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory:’
9) Learning that I was actually weak helped my recovery… – Being afflicted was a good thing for me, because I lived a really comfortable, yet dead life up till I was about 15. Then it was like affliction brought me to LIFE.
Psalm 119:67, ‘Before I was afflicted I went astray: but now have I kept thy word.’ I’m thankful, and though I wouldn’t wish for another eating disorder, for anything that God has to teach me.
If it takes some tough times, I want to be thankful for them, because that’s God has sharpened my roughest edges.
10) Last of all, it was learning from ALL my blogger babes that health looks different. – It was learning that grace, God’s grace is unconditional and that I can’t work my way to His love by being a good gal.
He makes me good, but I don’t make myself good for Him. He enables me to walk in the fruit of the Spirit and not want to have the perfect body anymore, but to want to pursue His holiness instead.
This girls teach me that BEAUTY is not a size, not a number, not a look but an attitude of the heart was the biggest thing I’ve learned from these babes.
I could go on and on, but instead I’m going to share some of their articles on body image, recovery, food, and just life in general. These girls are the best. They keep things real and really beautiful.
(Ashley’s Scones are AMAZING – I used strawberries instead of blueberries)
11) Last but not least, food helped my recovery. – This is more of a matter of fact thing, because if you don’t eat calories your body will starve. And the foodie community I’m a part of doesn’t put any food off limits.
So I’m eating everything and really enjoying and praising God for His abundant provision for the body that I starved for so long.
In recovery, no food is ‘bad’ because God made it and called it good. So… I’ve tried everything from Natalie’s ‘Banana Protein Pancakes’
(pictured above) to…
Muscle Frosting from You Fresh Naturals! I received three of these jars to develop some recipes and giveaway a jar for my Instagram friends. 🙂
This was the jar I gave away yesterday, and I can testify to it being SO GOOD. It’s like eating raw chocolate chip cookie dough that has extra protein.
You know who inspires me with their food creations? Rachel Mansfield is a very genuine Instagrammer and blogger, and I can’t wait to meet her someday soon, because she inspires me. She has everything from simple bread recipes to boozy creamsicle floats on her site.
This is her ‘Flourless Oatmeal Raisin Bread’, and you won’t believe that she actually doesn’t like food photography when you look at her site. 🙂 I learned that from Nicole Culver’s podcast with her.
And right now I want to give a shoutout to a recovery warrior who is fighting SO HARD RIGHT NOW. That is my precious, beloved Cora. Would you head to her site and give her some support? <3
Last of all… what am I doing right now but… um… eating and watching a movie with my family? But, you know what the difference is? I’m not obsessed with the food. I’m hungry, so I eat, but life isn’t about food.
I eat about double the calories I ate a few years ago. Although I would like to be back at 100% intuitive eating, I’m not yet. Right now I’m really content at eating over 2300-2500+ calories a day, but I’m not focused on that number.
I have to be honest, because I do sub-consciously count calories, but day by day, I’m caring less and less about the calories and more about really living for Jesus, by His grace. It’s a journey, and I’m thankful you’re coming along with me.
By the way, YOGURT + TRAIL MIX+ Almighty Foods Walnut Butter is an amazing movie snack.
Really, y’all, like Joyce said, ‘To Eat is not a high stakes question.’
Best Recovery/Body Image/Life Links:
Why Can’t I Stop Thinking About Food? – One of the most pertinent questions in recovery…
Food and Nutrition Myths – Thankful for Sarah constantly debunking the myths…
Thoughts on Clean Eating – I just wanted to hug Amanda after reading her heart on this one.
Figuring Out Healthy Eating – All about the balance…
Why You Feel Worse When Starting Recovery – The darkness may come before the dawn…
When You Do Everything Right – I know this struggle, and it even happened in recovery. . . Sometimes the best things just come in time, but it’s a struggle to wait.
The Transformation Tuesday Picture I’m Not Proud Of – Amanda, it took a lot of courage to write this, and I am rooting for you in your recovery.
Eat Something Delicious Every Day – This is actually a really good recovery challenge. I was kind of going, ‘Yes. Yes. Yes. I want to do this….’ 🙂
My Issue with the Fitspo Community – Marina, you wrote this so beautifully. <3 Thank you for your grace and truth in this.
Recipes to Try/Food Blogger Fun:
S’mores Chocolate Avocado Pudding – Rachel and Bethany have been pouring out the yummy s’mores recipes, and I am just chomping at the bit to try one soon. 🙂
Honest Food Blogger Confessions – Kat is just hilarious…
Chocolate Chip Skillet Cookie – So I kind of have a goal to try as many of Ashley’s recipes as possible, and this is one of them but I haven’t done it yet. 🙂
Why I Blog Even Though I Hardly Have Any Time – This is ME to a ‘T.’ I probably have a bit more time, but some days, I wonder if I still want to, but I DO because I love it so much, and I’m so thankful for this community… 🙂
AAnddd who’s ready for a PROTEIN-ful Birthday Cake cookie recipe coming up on Saturday?
Do you agree that food in essence is just that, food?
Have you tried muscle frosting?
Do you know anyone who has been homeschooled?
If you are in recovery, what are some of the biggest factors that have helped you?
Who are the people in your life who love you the most?